That's Unfortunate:)

A little background maybe for better understanding but more for sympathy for the story that follows;): I am a morning person. I mean I am not a 6:00 am morning person, but mornings are good for me. It is when I historically have been at the peak of my mental sharpness. Since becoming a mom, the fact that I am a morning person hasn't changed but that peak I just spoke about has leveled off somewhat. I have four kiddos and usually one or three have found their way into our bed at some point during the night. (I kind of hate it but kind of love it all the same.) That being said, although I am not quite as sharp as I used to be in the mornings it is still when I am make the most efficient use of my time and it sets the tone for my day.
So a few months back, I was on it. I mean I was getting the kids ready for school, my husband ready for work, the house ready for any unexpected visitors, & myself ready to actually exit the car. (I usually take the kids the 4 blocks to school barefoot and in my pajamas never really considering what I would do if the car broke down or if I was in an accident.) This was a day I was ready for. And since I was clean, I decided I might as well show that off so I decided to make a surprise visit to my in-laws at work. My father in-law has an optometric office in Shell Knob that they work at on Tuesdays. So, I scurried around finishing my last few tasks before heading out to meet them for lunch. At this time, my youngest, Mac, was about 3 months old so I needed to nurse him just before departure. As with many young babies, Mac was quite regular during feedings, and it was always a guess as to what kind of trouble we were going to be in. On this day in particular, I was about half way done feeding when I began to feel a warm sensation on my leg. After I shut my eyes and said a small prayer, I lifted Mac to survey the damage. Oh no! It was everywhere, on Mac, the bedspread, my jeans. Well, I decided to clean up in that order. I changed Mac which unfortunately involved washing his face and hair because of course, on this day, we were wearing an outfit that had to go up and over;) Then I stain sticked the bedspread and threw it in the wash praying that mustard color would come out of my light colored bedspread. (Why I continue to choose colors that are so unfriendly to boys is a mystery to me! Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!) Lastly, I needed to address my clothing situation. As I mentioned, Mac was only a few months old at this point so my clothing options were limited. I still had only one pair of jeans that fit without total muffin top so changing was not an option. It was all about spot cleaning for today:) Thankfully, it all wiped up fairly easily. I was out the door within just about 20 minutes with only a wet spot on my thigh as evidence of the disaster of doo doo that just took place.
Lunch was great. My in-laws were really surprised by our visit and happy to see us. After we returned home, I proceeded to take my jeans off so that now they could be washed properly. I mean, the stains were gone, at least I thought, but the jeans needed to be scrubbed for simple peace of mind. I took them off and laid them on the washing machine. Yep! It is as it seems. I guess in my haste, I failed to check the backside. Yes, I walked around for roughly 8 hours (a few mom and pop shops, lunch at a real restaurant not a drive-thru, from the front to the back room of my father in-laws optometric office and back up front again) with mustard yellow poo in the sweet spot of my backside. No one said anything. I mean, okay, I can hope that those people at the optometric office had severely poor vision and just couldn't see the offense but what about everyone else? Maybe they didn't notice? Nah! Ot did they just feel too bad to tell me? I had two little boys, ages 3 & 3 months, on hand so maybe people just didn't have the heart. I don't know. They probably thought, "That poor girl has her hands so full she has not the time nor the sense to check the mirror." Or worse, "That poor girl ain't got even the time, the sense, nor the control to just stop and "go".";)
Ugh, Shell Knob is a small town. Thankfully, my father in-law is the only optometrist there so even if they wanted to, they couldn't hold it against him. Heck, maybe they feel bad for him, know he must have a lot on his plate with a daughter in-law like that. "Girl probably ain't got the sense to get out of the rain!" Sadly, after four boys, they might be right about all the above:)